hm.. so recently i was talking to this guy, and we were feeling each other. and i guess its just the world and what’s “in”. or im just a fucking dumbass, and i read the signals the wrong way. but later on in the talking process, he just blatantly tells me that he’s just going to fool around with this guy. and he’s just going to blow him, like no big deal and everything. at this point i was just completely turned off. giving him one word responses. just begging for him to just leave for his little triste. can it just be all over?
is this just a current trend? i do notice it just happen, it’s as common as a fucking handshake now. a hand shake with a fucking condom. sumtimes not even that.
why cant there just be nice guys. that dont think this way?
is that so hard? i mean i know that there are several reasons why i cant find him now, and its just the age, time, and sex.
now is the age to just throw caution into the wind, to spread seeds, etc. how else do i go about this? being a college student, just things are more liberal.
in this day and age, everyone seems to be more open to sex. etc. i mean sure i understand that waiting does have it’s ups and downs, and im going to be alittle complaining bitch about it, but it’s just, it tears me up inside…
it’s just known that bois are hornier than gurls. lets not kid ourselves on this point.
the grim one.
ps. fuck you, for the one that lost me without knowing it.
so alittle story today that was pretty cute and awkward happened in my physics lab. so there are pre lab quizzes that happens every week in lab, and i was paired up with this one asian girl. as the quiz ensued, torturing my brain, i look over and i see that she’s looking for her calculator. i, being the nerd that i am, have two calculators. so i reach into my bag, and pulled out two calculators; one is kinda like a book, with a flap and all, and the other is a graphing calculator. i feeling superior, take the graphing calculator, and give her the “book” calculator. i see that there is a green slip in the calculator. i think nothing of it and hand her the calculator.
she opens the flap and the both of us see a trojan condom…..
i seriously thought that the green flap was a post it or sumthing…
i never got the time to clean out my backpack, and i dont intend to do anything remotely needing a comdom in a while….
she flung the condom onto the shared desk, and i just hurrily just shoved it back into my backpack…
i was pretty red, but just thought what happened happened, just let it go… just thought that was a good FML story.. :P
spring quarter always seems to be the quarter of change. a quarter of growth, both in terms of life’s outlook/perspective in life, and in social interactions with others. i believe this year was an interesting year that encouraged me to grow into the person that i want to be.
this year has been at interesting experience. i have experienced man firsts in my life. first off, i experienced my first love, that was something new. also simply living by myself, without that horrid dorm food has made me sumwhat of a health nut. i notice that i dont eat as much as opposed to me being with my parents, or simply compared to last year. this year i have put an incredible amount of hard work into student orgs and the different aspects of how the university functions.
this year alone i have gotten to understand the student government and how mischievious some of the future senators are.
i have gotten to be really in tune with the LGBT resource center on campus, how the funds were redirected away from the center due to the economic crisis in california. it’s a shame that valuable resources could have been produced if enough money were to be given to the center that can potentially benefit anyone.
the LGBTRC also got me involved with the admin part of the school. i am now in CAC (chancellor’s advising commitee). i get to work with those in the admin, and i get an understanding of how the school’s paperwork gets processed and reviewed.
i have gotten to see the aspect of being in a large/popular student org. this was ASPB. people definitely look at my differently, sometimes at a position of power, or ask me when events are, when i tell them that i am in ASPB. i have also seen the smaller side of student orgs. QPOC is a small and cozy org. that have the same passion and drive that ASPB, but caters to a smaller crowd, than the whole school. and yet another aspect is the acapella group. this is a new, incoming student org. and how it’s hard to even start its bearings. this group has “breaking in” factors that their older counterparts have overcome. lets just hope we make it through ^_^.
this year is also a year that i learned to have a planner. :) i named it wale (pronounced wall - ay ) it has helped me though… well spring quarter.
more firsts that happened. hmmmmm… mayybe i should do vlogs.. LOL..
Do not fear death, for one thing you may forget is that you have already experienced death, you see before you were born, you were dead. You were in the state of non-existance which we call death, you have been dead for 13 billion years now and only recently have you attained life. When you die you will return to the state of existence you were in before you were born.Think back as far as you can, now think before that, that my friend, is death.
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart) i am never without it(anywhere i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing,my darling) i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true) and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
I am not yours, not lost in you, Not lost, although I long to be Lost as a candle lit at noon, Lost as a snowflake in the sea. You love me, and I find you still A spirit beautiful and bright, Yet I am I, who long to be Lost as a light is lost in light. Oh plunge me deep in love - put out My senses, leave me deaf and blind, Swept by the tempest of your love, A taper in a rushing wind.
just to say hi to all of you and tell you alittle bit about myself.
my name is vincent, vince for short.
i currently attend UCR, majoring in Biochemistry with a medical science emphasis. i plan to become a doctor someday, i just dont know what my focus is going to be in yet. i recently got a planner and it’s pretty amazing, it has everything that i need in it :P cuz if you have to know sumthing about me, i am now very involved on campus and i totally love it. just to give you a hint of what i like to do on campus. i am involved with Biological evolutionary research under the tutelage of martin turcotte. i also have a job on campus, i tutor those that are in danger of failing a class, these students are pinpointed by their grades in their first midterms… sorry i dont make up the rules, i just get paid by them…. >.<. i recently got into a nice position at ASPB, associated student programming board- essentially a board of students that hold a variety of programs on campus.
i also like to sing, and show that in my everyday life, and in my academics. i am in choir, cuz i love the unity of harmonies in a choir, and the fact that choirs are just like big families. ^_^. through the choir, i am able to get a voice scholarship that helps me hone my singing skills as a solo performer. i am so passionate about music and singing that i also an a cappella group on campus.
the last thing that i like to help out on campus is the LGBTRC, the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender resource center. i am currently on the cancellor’s advising commitee and about to become a peer mentor for the LGBTRC. speaking of peer mentoring, i will become a peer mentor for the honors program. im pretty excited about getting involved in the honors program on campus.
things that i like to do off of campus is help volunteer at the local hospital through a program named CCE, clinical care extenders. there are shifts that i take, and it’s pretty exciting. i had the opportunity to volunteer at the ICU, post partum, med surge, cath lab, and soon to be ER w00t w00t. and finally i am also in a hosting program linked to the campus. i work with the school and sponsor this high school outreach program that introduces students to the campus of UCR, and i get to show them around the campus, then they crash a night at my place.
aside from that, im just a normal science major that takes labs, midterms and finals. i would like to say that i do well in my classes. more indepth about myself to come :) see yahs